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2006 Sertoma Installation
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2007 Sertoma Installation
Pictures from Ski Trip 2008,  2009
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CLICK HERE for SOWS going back about 4 years
CLICK HERE to see 2008 Installation pics
2009 Ski Trip


Published regularly by Sertoma Club of Fort Collins. All rights reserved.  .  If you would like to be removed from distribution, or would like to keep your  email current; send updates to Editor.  Copyright 2008, Fort Collins Sertoma Club


Lee Cooper


Contact Lee Cooper with your program!  




3/20 Ron Lautzenheiser...Ray Martinez and Ron Lautzenheiser on Project Smile Update
3/27 Ed Caffrey.... John Bidwell on Electric Overdrive Vehicles
June 12 ~ Sertoma Golf Tournament


     Brags and Notices
                             January 9, 2004, our Foundation total is
                          December 31, 2004 ~ $24, 089.63
December 31, 2005 ~ $35,308.09
                         December 31, 2006 ~ $47,696.52
                        June 29, 2007 ~ $50, 911.02

                        July, 2008 ~ $53,134
January, 2009 ~ $40,654

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The SOW (Sertoman of the Week)


These clues should be sung to the tune of a Scottish ballad:

1.  His grandfather hails from Scotland, from the town of Leath.
2.  His mother was a Valentine and met John Kennedy.
3.  His brother serves our country now, far across the sea.
4.  His sister is a president of a company.
5.  Our SOW is just a simple man, no one of import.
6.  Always a fine gentleman, always a good sport.
7.  His father made sweet beverages, only the Real Thing.
8.  Our brother likes to play guitar, and sometimes likes to sing.
9.  But his songs are not heard today, for he lives alone.
10.  He works a bit, but plays much more.  His leisure is his own.
11.  Our brother hails from the North Star state, with 10,000 lakes
12.  He knows the law, and knows it well, but sometimes makes mistakes.
13.  Have you guessed our brother yet, do you have a clue?
14.  Salt and pepper, with a tan, is he next to you?

Fine gentleman, Zach Wilson (L), receives the SOW trophy from Jay Gerdes (R)


Grab a cup of hot chocolate, and check out these pics from the 2008 Ski Trip, compliments of Ken Borrett!
(click on 'em)


Sertoma Ski Trip 2009

If anyone else has pics, send 'em to me and I'll archive them on the web site with these.




Norm took pictures at our 40th Anniversary meeting.  To look at his pictures,
click on the following link:  www.rehme.com/sertoma  Click on a picture to see larger version.  Right click it
to download a copy to your computer.  If you have any problems, email me and I'll send you what you want. 


Ken Borrett had a $5 brag for the cooks on the ski trip for "going above and beyond the call of duty".  He also told us about Art someone on the ski trip who had good manners.  Ken told him that, with a "ground blizzard" in effect, just pick up the steak sandwich and eat it!

Larry Glass had a brag that, unlike some of us poor bastards, he was NOT home . . . . he told us how he and the Princess celebrated her birthday in Hawaii, where the temperature
down to 68 degrees.


John Clagett had a $20 brag for the anniversary of his dad's death.  Had he lived he would be 80.

Ken Reiter related a story to us about a day he spent recently in the Douglas County Schools. 
He was with a "young person" who is aspiring to become Principal.  Seems this lady was concerned that teachers were just too soft on students these days.  When pressed for an example, she told of watching a teacher in the hallway between classes.  A student walked by and remarked "I hate this fucking class!"  The teacher replied "I hate to tell you this honey, but this is Algebra, not fucking class!"

Frank Johnson brought in a check to pick up the IOU from last week for his 68th birthday!

John Clagett has a recommendation for us ~ He says we have to watch host Jon Stewart lay into the CNBC commentator, Rick Santelli  "The incredible Santelli'' is famous for "Santelli's rant'' on the floor of the Chicago Mercantile Exchange, a broadcast diatribe against the Obama administration's bailout of bad mortgages. 
Clagett called this "one of the best pieces of media he's ever seen".  Check it out! 
(click on it!)

Bill Brown had a Sven & Ole joke sent him by Nutter:

Olaf & Sven were fishing one day when Sven pulled out a cigar Finding he had no matches, he asked Olaf for a light.
"Ya, shure, I tink I haff a lighter," he replied. Then reaching into his tackle box, he pulled out a Bic lighter 10 inches long.
"Yiminy Cricket!" exclaimed Sven, taking the huge Bic lighter in his hands "Vhere dit yew git dat monster??"
"Vell," replied Olaf, "I got it from me Genie."
"You haff a genie in yor tackle box?" Sven asked.
"Ya, shure It's right here in my tackle box," says Olaf.
"Could I see him?"
So Olaf opens his tackle box & sure enough, out pops the genie.
Addressing the genie, Sven says,
"Hey dere! I'm a good friend of your master. Vill you grant me vun vish?"
"Yes, I will," says the genie.
So Sven asks the genie for a million bucks. The genie disappears back into the tackle box leaving Sven sitting there, waiting for his million bucks.
Shortly, the sky darkens & is filled with the sound of a million ducks... flying overhead.
Over the roar of the million ducks Sven yells at Olaf. "Yumpin' Yimminy I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks!"
Olaf answers, "Ya, I forgot to tell yew dat da genie is hart of hearing.

Do yew really tink I asked for a 10-inch Bic?"


John Stouffer had a brag for his grandson, apparently cleanup hitter on a Denver Metro baseball (?) team.  He hit two homeruns in State Tournament in Grand Junction last weekend.


Board Meeting is next Tuesday, March 10th.  You know the drill.

A tentative date has been set for the golf tournament.  Our Golf Czar, Mike Tarantino, tells us that Friday, June 12th is the date to mark on your calendar.

Dan Kaup thanked Mr. Clagett for ramroddin' the ski trip again this year . . . seems though, as usual, we have a number of lift tickets left over again.  John has about 10 lift tickets we've acquired for $56 instead of the usual $92 that will be good through this season.  Help John out (and score some cheap lift tickets at the same time).  Call him at 215-5706.

The POT was won by Fast Eddy Stoner!

Paddy was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place.. Looking up to heaven he said, "Lord take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of me life and give up me Irish Whiskey!"

Miraculously, a parking place appeared.

Paddy looked up again and said, "Never mind, I found one."






Meets every third Tuesday at 5:00 - 7 ~ at Pappy's, located at Shields and Horsetooth, behind Hibachi Grill, and next to the Vision Center. 



"It's the choices who make us who we are. And we can always choose to do what's right."
~ Spiderman


The 75 Skills Every Man Should Master

A man can be expert in nothing, but he must be practiced in many things. Skills. You don't have to master them all at once. You simply have to collect and develop a certain number of skills as the years tick by. People count on you to come through. That's why you need these, to start.

A Man Should Be Able To:

20. Sew a button.

21. Argue with a European without getting xenophobic or insulting soccer.
Once, in our lifetime, much of Europe was approaching cultural and political irrelevance. Then they made like us and banded together into a union of confederated states. So you can always assume that they were simply copying the United States as they now push us to the verge of cultural and political irrelevance.

22. Give a woman an orgasm so that he doesn't have to ask after it.
Otherwise, ask after it.

23. Be loyal. You will fail at it. You have already. A man who does not know loyalty, from both ends, does not know men. Loyalty is not a matter of give-and-take: He did me a favor, therefore I owe him one. No. No. No. It is the recognition of a bond, the honoring of a shared history, the reemergence of the vows we make in the tight times. It doesn't mean complete agreement or invisible blood ties. It is a currency of selflessness, given without expectation and capable of the most stellar return.

24. Know his poison, without standing there, pondering like a dope. Brand, amount, style, fast, like so: Booker's, double, neat.

25. Drive an eightpenny nail into a treated two-by-four without thinking about it.
Use a contractor's hammer. Swing hard and loose, like a tennis serve.

26. Cast a fishing rod without shrieking or sighing or otherwise admitting defeat.

27. Play gin with an old guy. Old men will try to crush you. They'll drown you in meaningless chatter, tell stories about when they were kids this or in Korea that. Or they'll retreat into a taciturn posture designed to get you to do the talking. They'll note your strategies without mentioning them, keep the stakes at a level they can control, and change up their pace of play just to get you stumbling. You have to do this -- play their game, be it dominoes or cribbage or chess. They may have been playing for decades. You take a beating as a means of absorbing the lessons they've learned without taking a lesson. But don't be afraid to take them down. They can handle it.

28. Play go fish with a kid.
You don't crush kids. You talk their ear off, make an event out of it, tell them stories about when you were a kid this or in Vegas that. You have to play their game, too, even though they may have been playing only for weeks. Observe. Teach them without once offering a lesson. And don't be afraid to win. They can handle it.

29. Understand quantum physics well enough that he can accept that a quarter might, at some point, pass straight through the table when dropped.
Sometimes the laws of physics aren't laws at all. Read The Quantum World: Quantum Physics for Everyone, by Kenneth W. Ford.

30. Feign interest. Good place to start: quantum physics.

31. Make a bed.



Sertoman Accomplishments Birth/Death
Ed Hull      
Stan Shalla    
David James    
Don Sendgraf    
Dick Manges Past President  
Bill Banks Past President/ Past Governor  
Marvin (Marv) Fries  Charter Member  
Harv Nesbitt    
Jim Nichols Charter Member, Past President, SOY 10/5/29 ~
Gen. Bill Mauer    
Jim Hoeven Charter Member  
Pete Montagriff   9/15/34 - 4/15/ 2005
Jim Waltz   11/2/36 ~ 8/23/2005
Ron Kresl   3/29/32 / ~ 12/18/05
Bob Leinart   4/30/41 ~ 2/16/06
Larry Chaussee   11/4/58 ~ 12/19/06
John McLean   8/23/39 ~ 2/10/08
Chuck Blazek   5/17/39 - 5/22/2007
Denny Farnsworth Past Pres. & SOY 6/23/41 ~ 6/10/09
Russell Butler   1/9/46 ~ 12/11/09
Paul McCoy   5/14/31 ~ 12/11/10
Jerry Bender   2/21/1948 ~ 3/1/2011
Dick Ziporlin   2/8/1931~ 6/4, 2011
Bob Reed Operation Santa Claus 9/5/1932 ~ 10/5/2011
John Drescher Charter Member / Sgt. at Arms/ Ski Trip 8/29/31 ~ 2/12/2012
David Lee Thomas   8/6, 1930 - 1/16, 2013

The Sertoma Board usually meets EVERY SECOND Tuesday  AT NORTH AMERICAN TITLE COMPANY  AT 5:30 p.m.  





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