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Published regularly by Sertoma Club of Fort Collins. All rights reserved.  .  If you would like to be removed from distribution, or would like to keep your  email current; send updates to Editor.  Copyright 2008, Fort Collins Sertoma Club

Lee Cooper


Contact Lee Cooper with your program!  



6/12  NO MEETING   Golf tournament to benefit Crossroads Safehouse
6/19 Don Simecka     Professional Athletic Trainer
7/1  Past Presidents Meeting - Mulligans, 5:30 (p.m.)
7/26 - Installation Banquet, held at Wil Holz' house this year

     Brags and Notices
                             January 9, 2004, our Foundation total is
                          December 31, 2004 ~ $24, 089.63
December 31, 2005 ~ $35,308.09
                         December 31, 2006 ~ $47,696.52
                        June 29, 2007 ~ $50, 911.02

                        July, 2008 ~ $53,134
January, 2009 ~ $40,654

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The SOW (Sertoman of the Week)


1.   . . . loves to cook, especially for large gatherings; he thinks his specialty is salmon.
2.   . . . has refused on several occasions over the years to be nominated/elected President of our club.
3.  . . . tried for a short time to sell water to the unsuspecting public, pretending to understand some arcane science about moving molecules across impermeable barriers.
4.  . . . . loves dogs and bunny rabbits and squirrels, but restricts his home to kitty cats.
5. . . . is a native Coloradoan; he moved early and grew up in a small state (CA) west of here.
6.  . . . is a key member of the Fort Collins SERTOMA Masochist's Club, who beat themselves up regularly
by trying to play golf, not only here in Ft. Collins, but in neighboring cities like Loveland and Windsor.
7.  . . . . . . has been know to exclaim, following an unfortunate but prodigious slice off the tee, that he "will see you at the pass before winter kicks in."
8.  . . . thinks golf is a sport where the winner is the person who finds the most golf balls in the tall grass or the shallow lake, wins.
9. . .. .has a 25-foot collapsible ball retriever, and always wins!
10. . . . . had a friend who figured out that if you drop the "r"s in his name, it becomes "BAD BUNS".
11. . . . . finally learned, under expert Sertoma tutelage, to:
  1)understand that too much scotch in the evening made playing two rounds of golf the next day very difficult!
  2)ask for more than three strokes per side
  3)look for more than your own golf ball in hazards
  4)get pissed once in a while when he makes a bad shot

12.   . . . . is very involved with CASA House
13.  . . . . graduated the University of Redlands; was born in 1943


Obviously, anyone who knows Brad Burns knows these clues were all about him.  Before Brad arrived on Friday, however, Tim Miller, previous SOW, asked everyone to guess anyone but Brad.  The results were hilarious!  Brad sat, just shaking his head and grinning that lopsided grin of his.
Timmy had planned to make this a "roast", but there just warn't no shit on Bradford.  We'll all miss Brad . . . . let's just hope he misses us enough to tolerate a whole group of Colorado friends dropping in during the winter to play golf and drink his scotch!

Brad Burns (L), receives the SOW trophy from Tim Miller






Our esteemed President, Dan Kaup, with his one (and only!) golf trophy
Norm Rehme was in attendance in absentia through the modern miracle of electronics.  Brad
had Norm on the phone over the microphone to report on Dan Kaups ONLY golfing win.  Dan had offered a challenge to the club to find out the details of that win.  Anyone who did so would receive a free round of golf in our tournament this week. 
They needed to know 1.  The tournament that he won, 2. Team members,
3. the score, and 4. what type of ball he played. 
Norm ferreted out the facts, as follows:  1)  It was an ice fishing tournament, with 27 holes drilled with
ice augers 2) there were 3 clubs used with 3) two partners.  Their score was 16 under par.
This was a fund-raiser for the Lions Club, by the way.
Turns out it was also a fundraiser for us as well.  In true Sertoma fashion, Norm
asked Dan to donate his winnings of $115 to the Foundation!



Woody recognized the work our club has done over the past years, especially in
regard to youth baseball and The Lug Nuts.  Seems we sponsored these kids, beginning when they were around eight years old,  and they have just won their THIRD state championship in baseball as seniors.  Sadly enough, as seniors, this is the last year any of these kids will be playing together, it seems. 
These weren't close games, by the way.  Woody told us that they won the state championship games by an overall score of 86-15!  The closest any team came in the playoffs was 15-4. 
If you ever have doubts about what kind of influence WE can have on kids, remember this team that our club made happen, and think of the camaraderie and good fellowship they must have had over the years!

A message from Nathan, with Turning Point:
Turning Point Golf Tournament MONDAY JUNE 15th- Pelican Lakes…. $125 a person….
Call 567-0885 to register now!


Ed Caffrey's granddaughter graduated last week from CSU, holding down two jobs all the while.  She was also chosen for acceptance into graduate school.  "Not bad for a preemie", Ed said.

Jim Nutt is getting tickets for a Foxes ball game on June 28th.  He had 22 people interested
in going, and is buying 30 tickets.  If you're interested in going, give him a call!

FLAG DAY  is MONDAY!!!  Do You know where YOUR flags are!???!!


Ron Young had a check for $43for the Foundation in memory of his daughter, who would
have been 43.  November marks the third year that she was lost to domestic violence. 
He reminded us that our support is sorely needed.   Crossroads Safehouse,
provides services
and safe housing to adults and children affected by intimate partner abuse.

Ron Young tells us that Crossroads Safehouse has a scooter they are going donate to a silent raffle, with a beginning price of $1,500.

E. Scott had a brag for Tom Kula who has apparently sold his house on his own,
as a closing date has been set.


Bradford Albert, ready to kick some Nazi ass!

Bad Buns, back on the ground after his
inaugural flight in a B-17!

Friday, June 12th has been set for the Sertoma Annual golf tournament.  There will be a $10,000 cash prize on #8 for a hole in one, a putting contest, and a certificate (for everyone who enters!) for either a free club or a golf bag (although you will have to pay shipping costs).

Don Shannon recited a story to us a a reminder to always look at what we put in our mouth!  Seems he popped a coupla' multi-vitamins one morning on his way out, and soon found himself bouncing from wall to wall down his hallway.  When he woke up three hours later in the hospital, IV in arm, ('cause Diane thought he'd had a stroke), he soon figured out that his wife had set her sleeping pills down close to his vitamins, and he went to never-never land for a short vacation.  Whatta' guy!

Ken Borrett bragged (with a check to the Foundation) that he is 68 years old Friday!  Happy Birthday!!

Who knows what Woody was doing 65 years ago this weekend???
See below for the answer.


Rob Allerheiligen is back, at least for the summer, and two brags (for $5) that the CSU Marketing Department has been named by Business Week magazine as #2 in the U.S.!   and , 2) his grandson just turned 15 and is SO GOOD at hockey that h has 4 invitations to play for others!

Don Simecka told us about the 5th Annual Abby’s Signature Concert Series Piano Soiree
on Sunday, June 28th beginning at 5:30 p.m. at Jay’s Bistro
.  We are noted as one of the
prime sponsors for this series. 
We really get a lot of "bang for our buck" here . . . as I recall, our
past donation of $2,500 resulted in a $20,000 donation to Respite Care and Pathways Hospice.  "Five Pianos and a Harmonica" is what Don called it.
 Tickets are $50/person, reserved tables $350 for four people.  As before, we have a table reserved for us, so you might speak with Dan to see if there is
a ticket still available.  If not, go anyway . . . it's for a good cause.

The Realities event went well, Johnny K tells us . . . we sold "over 1,700 beers (not drinking quite that many).  We had about 30 Sertomans participate, netting about $4,600 bucks.  As you can see from THIS PICTURE, some of us had more fun than others!


We got a nice "Thank You" note from Spellbinders this week, as well as a "Thumbs Up" in the Doloradoan!  We donate
(I think $250) to them every year when they ask.  This is another program where our money goes a long way. 
"Spellbinders is dedicated to spreading the magic of oral storytelling by training volunteers to become storytellers in their communities" 
Nora Heaton, founder of the local Spellbinders group, recently told us they have told oral stories in 38 schools, 196 different classrooms, and more than 6,635 students, for a total of
over 27,000 listeners in the 2008 - 2009 school year.  WOW!
(If you think this doesn't motivate kids to communicate,
both verbally and through reading, think again!)


Spellbinders Storytellling

Bob Sutter's name was drawn to win the pot (AGAIN!), but he wasn't there.

We had David May, from the FC Chamber speak with us on Friday, the 5th.  He had a quote I particularly
enjoyed:  "If you're not at the table, you're on the menu".  So true.

NO MEETING this week.  GOLF at Mariana Buttes!!

The Installation Banquet will be held at Wil Holz's house this year.  He had a narrow window
of availability, which helped with the choosing of the date of Sunday, July 26th.

If YOU received on of our special awards last year, remember that it is YOUR responsibility to find a new recipient!  CLICK HERE for a refresher as to who our recipients were.

Terry Danielson won the pot May 21st, but he was not in attendance.

As last year's Sertoman of the Year, Bill Benton will be contacting YOU soon if you have been
a SOY.  We will need to choose one for this year.

Ken Reiter brought a "Thank You" from the Fossil Ridge Framers that we provided $2,200 to buy tools
with to get them started in their framing careers.

Steve Smith had his first brag . . . he wrote it out for Shawn Dunnigan to read to us 'cause he didn't think he'd be here.  Seems he gave money to Shawn to sign up for the golf tournament and Shawn didn't quite make the meeting.  Steve has given notice that if he doesn't make the cutoff to signup for the tournament,
he has Shawn's number!

E. Scott thanked everyone who turned out to help paint the house a few weeks back.

Poor Zipster . . . . he's arranged a chili cook-off for us at least twice now, and had even gotten "The Great Lewdini" to perform for us on July 16th, but the cook-off keeps getting bumped for one reason or another.
He most recently had it scheduled for July 25th, but Wil's house was only available for that weekend (for the Installation), so Dick's back to the drawing board.  Keep up the good work, Zip . . . it IS appreciated!





Answer:  Woody was digging foxholes at Normandy at D-Day plus 1, 65 years ago!









2009 Sertoma National Convention New Information!

The Nashville area Sertomans have obtained passes to area attractions. All registrations received by June 15 will be placed into a drawing for passes to
Dollywood                   Nashville Zoo                        NationalCorvetteMuseum            NashvilleShores           Belle Meade Plantation           AdventureScienceCenter            FirstCenter for the Visual Arts
Winners of this drawing will be notified and passes will be available at the Sertoma Registration Desk.

Need information on registering, hotel, or golfing

Sertoma Merchandise
The Sertoma Store will be doing year end inventory June 25th to 30th. During this time they will not be able to ship any merchandise. If you have any need for merchandise items or club supplies the first week of July please have your order to Sertoma Headquarters by June 20th. Any orders received during inventory will be held until the first week of July. 




The 75 Skills Every Man Should Master

A man can be expert in nothing, but he must be practiced in many things. Skills. You don't have to master them all at once. You simply have to collect and develop a certain number of skills as the years tick by. People count on you to come through. That's why you need these, to start.

A Man Should Be Able To:

52. Step into a job no one wants to do. When I was 13, my dad called me into his office at the large urban mall he ran. He was on the phone. What followed was a fairly banal 15-minute conversation, which involved the collection of rent from a store. On and on, droning about store hours and lighting problems. I kept raising my eyebrows, pretending to stand up, and my dad kept waving me down. I could hear only his end, garrulous and unrelenting. He rolled his eyes as the excuses kept coming. His assertions were simple and to the point, like a drumbeat. He wanted the rent. He wanted the store to stay open when the mall was open. Then suddenly, having given the job the time it deserved, he put it to an end. "So if I see your gate down next Sunday afternoon, I'm going to get a drill and stick a goddamn bolt in it and lock you down for the next week, right?" When he hung up, rent collected, he took a deep breath. "I've been dreading that call," he said. "Once a week you gotta' try something you never would do if you had the choice. Otherwise, why are you here?" So he gave me that. And this...

53. Sometimes, kick some ass.

54. Break up a fight. Work in pairs if possible. Don't get between people initially. Use the back of the collar, pull and urge the person downward. If you can't get him down, work for distance.

55. Point to the north at any time. If you have a watch, you can point the hour hand at the sun. Then find the point directly between the hour hand and the 12. That's south. The opposite direction is, of course, north.

56. Create a play-list in which ten seemingly random songs provide a secret message to one person.

57. Explain what a light-year is. It's the measure of the distance that light travels over 365.25 days.

58. Avoid boredom. You have enough to eat. You can move. This must be acknowledged as a kind of freedom. You don't always have to buy things, put things in your mouth, or be delighted.

59. Write a thank-you note. Make a habit of it. Follow a simple formula like this one: First line is a thesis statement. The second line is evidentiary. The third is a kind of assertion. Close on an uptick.

Thanks for having me over to watch game six. Even though they won, it's clear the Red Sox are a soulless, over-marketed contrivance of Fox TV. Still, I'm awfully happy you have that huge high-def television. Next time, I really will bring beer. Yours,

60. Be brand loyal to at least one product. It tells a lot about who you are and where you came from. Me? I like Hellman's mayonnaise and Genesee beer, which makes me the fleshy, stubbornly upstate ne'er-do-well that I will always be.

61. Cook bacon. Lay out the bacon on a rack on a baking sheet. Bake at 400 degrees for 15 minutes.



Sertoman Accomplishments Birth/Death
Ed Hull      
Stan Shalla    
David James    
Don Sendgraf    
Dick Manges Past President  
Bill Banks Past President/ Past Governor  
Marvin (Marv) Fries  Charter Member  
Harv Nesbitt    
Jim Nichols Charter Member, Past President, SOY 10/5/29 ~
Gen. Bill Mauer    
Jim Hoeven Charter Member  
Pete Montagriff   9/15/34 - 4/15/ 2005
Jim Waltz   11/2/36 ~ 8/23/2005
Ron Kresl   3/29/32 / ~ 12/18/05
Bob Leinart   4/30/41 ~ 2/16/06
Larry Chaussee   11/4/58 ~ 12/19/06
John McLean   8/23/39 ~ 2/10/08
Chuck Blazek   5/17/39 - 5/22/2007
Denny Farnsworth Past Pres. & SOY 6/23/41 ~ 6/10/09
Russell Butler   1/9/46 ~ 12/11/09
Paul McCoy   5/14/31 ~ 12/11/10
Jerry Bender   2/21/1948 ~ 3/1/2011
Dick Ziporlin   2/8/1931~ 6/4, 2011
Bob Reed Operation Santa Claus 9/5/1932 ~ 10/5/2011
John Drescher Charter Member / Sgt. at Arms/ Ski Trip 8/29/31 ~ 2/12/2012
David Lee Thomas   8/6, 1930 - 1/16, 2013

The Sertoma Board usually meets EVERY SECOND Tuesday  AT NORTH AMERICAN TITLE COMPANY  AT 5:30 p.m.  





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