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2006 Sertoma Installation

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    Dr. John's 2007 Christmas Party

CLICK HERE for SOWS going back about 4 years

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2009 Ski Trip


Published regularly by Sertoma Club of Fort Collins. All rights reserved.  .  If you
would like to be removed from distribution, or would like to keep your  email
current; send updates to Editor.  Copyright 2009, Fort Collins Sertoma Club

Reuel Rolston
   Contact Reuel with your program!

Stuckee                                 Date                
Borrett   November 13, 2009      
Borett Ken November 20, 2009      
Brown   November 27, 2009   Lincoln Center not Available  
Bryan   December 4, 2009      
Bush   December 11, 2009      
  December 18, 2009   Larry  Glass special  
  December 25, 2009   No Meeting  
  January 1, 2010   No Meeting

     Brags and Notices
                             January 9, 2004, our Foundation total is
                          December 31, 2004 ~ $24, 089.63
December 31, 2005 ~ $35,308.09
                         December 31, 2006 ~ $47,696.52
                        June 29, 2007 ~ $50, 911.02

                        July, 2008 ~ $53,134
January, 2009 ~ $40,654

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(stock quotes)

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Finding People

Infospace WhoWhere


The SOW (Sertoman of the Week)

1.   . . . was born in Fort Collins

2.   . . . has one brother, 7 years older.

3.  . . . . attended Bauder elementary school.

4. . . . enjoyed playing with mountain lion cubs as a kid.

5.  . . . .played the cello in school.  Hence, he was a cellist.


6. . . . . . with a 50% attendance record in Jr. High, had more fun out of school than in!

7. . . . . . says his worst experience in high school was his first real girlfriend.

8. . . . . . says that his best experience in high school was also his first girlfriend.

9. . . . . . has served in the armed forces . . . having been in the Army 82nd Airborne.

10. . . . . . holds a Master of Real Estate degree.

11. . . . . has worked for the State of Colorado, Front Range Housing, and REMAX.

12. . . . . is married with one daughter.

Well, didja' know who this is?  I sure didn't.  Look below for the answer.  By the way, especially for you newer  guys, I have some SOW Guidelines if you're curious about how all this works.  Just click on it.  We're really pretty flexible.  The idea is to get to know each other a little better, and maybe have some fun along the way.








Thanks to Dave B. for the pics!


Wednesday, November 11th

Veterans Day is our next Flag Day!

Not too long ago, Bob Kopplin, our club Secretary, bragged on "most of" the members.  Seems most of the members are paying their dues on time, that all bills are current (!!), and he says "THANK YOU" for all of your efforts! 
Let's remember that much of the credit for our sound financial fiscicality (this should be a word!) has to to to the esteemed Dan Kaup for teaching us how to not spend what we don't have, and our ex-Treasurer, Chris McDonald.  Good work, everyone!

Our Flag Czar, Brad Dusek, reminds us that Veterans Day, November, 11th, is rapidly approaching.  DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOUR FLAGS ARE???  OOPS . . . that just happened.  never mind.


John K tells us that we are reaping about $2K per football game, overall.  I saw a report at the Board Meeting on Tuesday that shows his original estimate of 2K per game is almost EXACTLY right.  Turns out we're averaging $2,001.37!  Lots of new faces, as well, at the games.  Keep up the good work!

Ed Caffrey had an interesting story (kind of) about how he and Ann sold their business 5 years ago to the Mawhinneys (totally a guess on spelling).  Their son, Teran, was with them.  He was 11 at the time.  Recently Teran made 6 TOUCHDOWNS playing for Poudre High School!  How time flies!

Zach Wilson (R) was recently presented The Golden Movement Award by club president, Ken Reiter, which, I'm told, Zach so richly deserved.

Good-Natured Zach, from the bowels of his
fertile imagination, strikes the traditional pose.

Rob Allerheiligen recently told us of a new business he was interested in investing in around The Fort . . . . Helium weather balloon rides!

Josh Benedict, local hero to all, recently announced his interest (among others) in starting a softball team.  Are YOU interested in playing??  Contact Josh at 219-6819 or jbenedict@ft.nyl.com.

LA LAW!      by Larry Abrahamson

Often the District Attorney's Office is questioned on its position regarding the release of information on cases that are being publicly prosecuted.  Our society has given the press broad privileges in what is referred to as the public’s “right to know”.  This right, although not a constitutional right, it is a right that has been accepted through practice.  This right is especially important when it may affect our safety or security.   The public also has an expectation to be informed about judicial proceedings, especially when the proceedings are matters of general community concern.   

When facts and circumstances surrounding a criminal act are not given to the media, there are good reasons why the information cannot be shared.  It is very important  . . . . . . CLICK HERE to see the remainder!

Our next football game will be the day after Thanksgiving, the 27th.  Kickoff is at 2 PM, so we need to be there two hours early; NOON!.

Brad Burns bragged that, since we all paid BIG BUCKS to send him away, he thought the least he could do was to model the cool flight jacket he received.  And he did!

Christmas***Party is scheduled for December 10th at Harmony Grill.  That would be a Thursday night.  Cocktails (from a cash bar) will begin at 6:30 p.m., with dinner beginning at 7:30.  There will be a LIVE BAND (as opposed to a dead one, I guess), and dancing after dinner.  So far, we have over 60 signed up.  Don Simecka is ramrodding this shindig, so contact him to sign up.  231-1059
The cost is $23 apiece.  That's $46 for you and your spouse, or significant other. 
Be there or BE SQUARE!
Our Treasurer, Bob Kopplin, has requested payment anytime now for the Party.  Why not STOP right now and put a check in the mail.  Mail it to:

Fort Collins Sertoma Club
P. O. Box 1083
Fort Collins, CO  80522


Address an envelope and stick your check in it now.  Go ahead.    I'll wait.  OK . . . . got 'er done????  Now you don't have to worry about it, and neither does Bob.  Thank You!


Ahhhhhhhhhhhh . . . . . . . .


Dearest Redneck Son,

I'm writing this slow because I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left home.

Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles of your home, so we moved. I won't be able to send you the address because the last West Virginia family that lived here took the house numbers when they moved so they wouldn't have to change their address.

This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine. I'm not sure about it. I put a load of clothes in and pulled the chain. We haven't seen them since.

The weather isn't bad here. It only rained twice last week; the first time for three days and the second time for four days.

About that coat you wanted me to send; your Uncle Billy Bob said it would be too heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets.

Bubba locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were really worried because it took him two hours to get me and your father out.

Your sister had a baby this morning, but I haven't found out what it is yet so I don't know if you are an aunt or uncle.

Uncle Bobby Ray fell into a whiskey vat last week. Some men tried to pull him out but he fought them off and drowned. We had him cremated.  He burned for three days.

Three of your friends went off a bridge in a pickup truck. Butch was driving. He rolled down the window and swam to safety. Your other two friends were in the back. They drowned because they couldn't get the tailgate down!

There isn't much more news at this time. Nothing much out of the normal has happened.
Your Favorite Aunt,


Overheard at (slow) beer sales at a recent football game:  "It's so f***in' quiet here, you
can hear the zippers in the men's room!"  ~ Th' Zipper



Ronny Bush bragged that he and his wife were participating in the Sheriff's Academy.  He told us how, on his ridealong with a sheriff, he was texting Allie:
Text 1.  Breaking 20 minutes, then riding to Area 4 in Loveland.
Text 2.  3 auto accidents, 1 rollover, and one car slid off into the mud
Text 3.  Executing search warrant at 9:30 a.m. re:  attack on 2 women near Estes Park.
Text 4.  10 officers at the house now . . . I'm in the locked car with my head down.
Text 5.  Parked away from the action; can't see anything; appears to be non-violent entry.
Text 6.  Done here . . . gone for donuts.

Ken Borrett (about a month ago) bragged how his son, Tad, won an Odyssey putter  in the Grand Prize Drawing at the District Attorney's Golf Tournament a while back!  (Phil & Ernie used this putter to finish 1st and 2nd in China).

Brad Burns had a $5 brag for being in a foursome in the DA's golf tournament with Bill Brown, Jim Manning, and Bob Kopplin, and WINNING!!!  Two years in a row the Sertoma team won this tournament . . . . TRADITION!!!


Dick Acott took note of the weather and told us he would soon be gone to warmer climes.  See ya' in the Spring, Dick!

Carl Glaser was trying to organize a trip to the corn maze a while back.  Don't know if he ever made it, but it sounded like fun. 

Roger Sample bragged about recent publications concerning Sample and Bailey.  He also shared "a little story" about his recent visit to Equitable Savings and Loan.  (This was on October 1)  Seems he was in said establishment when a man walked in waving a pistol, screaming "Get down on the floor!!!"  Well, he did.  And came to find that he was in the was in the middle of a holdup.  The guy was yelling "GET ON THE FLOOR . . . .give me the f-ing money, give me the f-ing money".  Well, 30 seconds later, the guy was gone, no one was hurt, and Roger has a story to tell his grandkids one day! 

Our resident Master Photographer, Norm Rehme, told us how he entered 4 prints in a State competition a while back, and came home with 3 RIBBONS AND A FIRST PLACE!!!  WOW!

This is a picture Norm titled "Arkalah", inspired by the annual
Halloween celebration in Arkansas City, Kansas, called "Arkalah", which means "good times".

Carl Glaser reported that he, Dave Williams, and th' Zippers recently came in second at the Brainiac Bowl.  They almost took first, but missed one critical 100-point question having to do with the name of the inventor of the battery.  Next Year, Guys!   Congratulations on 2nd!! 
(It was Alessandro Volta, btw, who invented the first "voltaic pile")

It was reported that next Wednesday, Applebee's is giving away free meals to veterans.  Wait.  That was today.  never mind.  again.  (this is harder than it looks, guys!)

Ken Borrett told us how he recently attended his 50th High School reunion.  There was an Elvis impersonator there who was apparently phenomenal, as Ken bragged on him.  He also had a second brag about a football game in Columbia, MO.  It poured down rain for the entire game . . . . at the end of 3 quarters Missouri led 12 - 0 . . . . . Nebraska won it 27 - 12!

Josh Benedict remarked upon Ken having mentioned three words together that should never
be in the same sentence . . . . Phenomenal . . . . . Elvis . . . . . Impersonator.

He also bragged on his grandfather, Peter Sengenberger, a WWII Army veteran who passed away recently.  Peter was married to Josh's grandmother for 61 years.  They had 10 children, 37 grandchildren, and 10 great-children.  Josh is #5 on the GC list.  He will be missed by many.

Conway Gandy bragged that he just had his 73rd Birthday!!  WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Jamison Martin and his girlfriend returned recently from Japan.  When asked to comment, Jamison told us he "almost came back single".  He tells us that Japan is "very westernized", very clean, very beautiful.  He promised us a slide show one day.

Norm bragged on his ride-gathering ability, year after year.

Terry Danielson told us how he recently called Camp Bow-Wow and asked for directions.  He said to the young lady that answered "I know I've seen you somewhere . . . are you north or south of Recycled Cycles?"  The young lady replied "it depends upon which direction you're coming from".  He never did get a straight answer from her, but I'm sure he found the camp.
Terry also bragged on his dad's 95th birthday last week.  Terry's brother turned 70, as well.  What he really wanted to brag on, however, was all the veterans in the house.

We had a really good picnic lunch outside the Lincoln Center a couple of weeks ago.

With the best flag imitation I've seen in a while, we
all paid allegiance to Ed.



EX-SOW, Okey Reese (R), hands off the trophy to Nathan Weinland, new SOW!

Rob Allerheiligen (rightly) pointed out that the Fort Collins Doloradoan has brought to mind a serious issue regarding one of our members.  Seems that Roger Sample has been practicing PUBIC ACCOUNTING for over 30 YEARS. 
Rob says "Laugh if you want," but he feels that we should either (1) Immediately EXPEL Roger and send out a press release disavowing any knowledge of his having been counting PUBIC HAIRS for 30 years, or (2) we can immediately delegate Roger as the Sertoman of the Century (SOC), change our status from service club to church, and WORSHIP HIM.  Roger replied that this was exactly right . . . . they have always held themselves out to be a "Full-Service" accounting firm. 
(Doesn't Roger get involved in the most interesting stuff!??!!

Bob Reed's Christmas program has begun . . . names were passed around and taken, but many remain.  If you would be interested in helping to provide a child in Fort Collins with a Christmas gift that s/he might not otherwise get, come and get a name.  The gift should be purchased and given for delivery to Bob by the first part of December.



Norm Rehme bragged that he has another grandchild, a little boy.  #7, I think he said.

I wasn't in attendance, but I heard of a couple of interesting brags . . . one from Ronny Bush, who apparently started life out as a female.  Seriously.  He reported that, while in Boulder a while back, he stopped in the records building to get a fresh birth certificate.  When he got it, he noticed that his sex had been marked "Female".  Of course, he's all "Change it, Change it", but, of course, that's not happening.  (Didja' like my Valley Girl??) 
Of course, there are only two ways that I can think of that this might happen.  1.  He was born in Trinidad and something happened before he left the hospital.  OR, 2.  The State screwed up.  Now, we all KNOW the state never screws up, so we might as well face it guys . . . . not only have we had our first female member, but she's been President!
His original birth certificate was signed by his mother 63 years ago as "FE" and that was carried forward when the records were computerized a few years ago.  It was corrected, but only after an exam by his doctor Mary Peterson and a letter by her to the State of Colorado.

The second brag (?) came from Carl Glaser who got lost in the woods.  As I got the story (again, second hand), Carl was like, looking for gingerbread crumbs, and wandered down canyon after interesting canyon. 
He did the right thing though . . . . as soon as he realized that it was going to be dark in MINUTES, and he was LOST, he hunkered down to spend a pretty miserable night, I should imagine, right there.  A search party (I heard 15 guys were out looking for him) found him the next day, safe and sound.  (Well, as sound as he ever was)   
Glad you made it out alive Carl . . . . . I think there's a law against poisoning wildlife!)

Have you ever wondered where the phrase "You've gotta' be shittin' me!" came from?  Well, Ron Young (unfortunately) told us.  You shoulda' been there!  It involved Private Peters, a house of ill-repute, and George Washington's crossing of the Delaware.

Golf Quotes

I was three over. One over a house, one over a patio, and one over a swimming pool.
~         George Brett

Actually, the only time I ever took out a one-iron was to kill a tarantula. And I took a 7 to do that.
           ~ Jim Murray

The only sure rule in golf is - he who has the fastest cart never has to play the bad lie.
~         Mickey Mantle
Sex and golf are the two things you can enjoy even if you're not good at them
 ~         Kevin Costner

I don't fear death, but I sure don't like those three-footers for par..
~         Chi Chi Rodriguez

After all these years, it's still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for
a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye.
~         Chi Chi Rodriguez

The ball retriever is not long enough to get my putter out of the tree.
           ~ Brian Weis

Swing hard in case you hit it.
           ~ Dan Marino

My favorite shots are the practice swing and the conceded putt. The rest can never be mastered.
           ~ Lord Robertson

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air.
           ~ Jack Benny

There is no similarity between golf and putting; they are two different games, one played in the air, and the other on the ground.
~         Ben Hogan

Professional golf is the only sport where, if you win 20% of the time, you're the best
~         Jack Nicklaus

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's almost a law.
           ~ H G Wells

I never pray on a golf course. Actually, the Lord answers my prayers everywhere except on the course.
           ~ Billy Graham

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play at it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf.
~         Bob Hope

While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.
~         Henny Youngman

If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
~         Jack Lemmon

You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives.  Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.
           ~ Lee Trevino

I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced.
 ~         Lee   Trevino















        CSU Beer Sales Dates

Weber State, 9/12 3 P.M. - Ag day  WON!

Nevada, 9/19 3 p.m.  Rams Legends Weekend  WON!!

Utah, 10/10 4 p.m.  Homecoming and Family Weekend  Lost

San Diego State, 10/24  2 p.m.  Band Day LOST

Air Force, 10/31  2 p.m.  Hall of Fame LOST

Wyoming, 11/27  NOON  maybe we'll win THIS one?





******************SERTOMA Hall of Fame*********************

Sertoman Accomplishments Birth/Death
Ed Hull      
Stan Shalla    
David James    
Don Sendgraf    
Dick Manges Past President  
Bill Banks Past President/ Past Governor  
Marvin (Marv) Fries  Charter Member  
Harv Nesbitt    
Jim Nichols Charter Member, Past President, SOY 10/5/29 ~
Gen. Bill Mauer    
Jim Hoeven Charter Member  
Pete Montagriff   9/15/34 - 4/15/ 2005
Jim Waltz   11/2/36 ~ 8/23/2005
Ron Kresl   3/29/32 / ~ 12/18/05
Bob Leinart   4/30/41 ~ 2/16/06
Larry Chaussee   11/4/58 ~ 12/19/06
John McLean   8/23/39 ~ 2/10/08
Chuck Blazek   5/17/39 - 5/22/2007
Denny Farnsworth Past Pres. & SOY 6/23/41 ~ 6/10/09
Russell Butler   1/9/46 ~ 12/11/09
Paul McCoy   5/14/31 ~ 12/11/10
Jerry Bender   2/21/1948 ~ 3/1/2011
Dick Ziporlin   2/8/1931~ 6/4, 2011
Bob Reed Operation Santa Claus 9/5/1932 ~ 10/5/2011
John Drescher Charter Member / Sgt. at Arms/ Ski Trip 8/29/31 ~ 2/12/2012
David Lee Thomas   8/6, 1930 - 1/16, 2013

The Sertoma Board usually meets EVERY SECOND Tuesday  AT NORTH AMERICAN TITLE COMPANY  AT 5:30 p.m.  






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